Two of my friends Paavani and Rithesh (names are
changed) have become good friends who were just college-mates until recently.
Rithesh didn't know that I and Paavani were friends since long. He introduced
me to her on a reason after which me and Paavani knew he is introducing those
who are acquainted each other and told the same to him. Rithesh is a good and
helping kind of person which Paavani has also realized it.
Paavani, recently one day called me to inform
about her joining to a new job. There was another comic instance to tell me
along that!!
Rithesh’s sister was her colleague and she has
several times altercated with her. Paavani once while talking to Rithesh has
shared about her office and her work, then suddenly Rithesh asked about a
person who also works there without mentioning it is his sibling. Paavani who
disliked that person described the adversity of his sister. When he let Paavani
know that she is his sister, she got stunned. She felt abashed for she scolded
his sister right in front of him and has quarreled with a person whose brother
is her friend whom she considers as a good person.
Then she called me who am a common friend to
both to share all these. She told me “Kousalya, his sister is an arrogant,
hoyden and harsh person, exact opposite to what wehave seen in Rithesh and I
have had clashes with her in office. And now I got to know she is Rithesh’s
sister which is embarrassing me.”
She continued“I won’t easily make friends, but I
felt somehow Rithesh is a good person and started talking to him. How is
Rithesh?? Is he really patient and helping as much as he looks to be?? When I
think of his sister, I cannot believe he is her brother, you tell me Kousalya
that am I with a good friend as you know him more than me.”
The scene of her complaining to Rithesh on his
sister without the knowledge of them as siblings looked humorous to me, I
started laughing at it. If joining a new job is good news, knowing that she has
a friend whose sister is insulted in front of him is a bad cum comic news. As I
knew Rithesh well, I told her “Don’t worry that it all happens. Don’t suspect
your friend; it is common that two from a single family need not be the same.
As far I know, Rithesh is a very good person anybody can ever meet. He has
helped many people and very understanding.He wouldn't have mind for all you
told about his sister”
We both continued to laugh for what has happened
and finished the conversation.
I thought to myself “Paavani was feeling
embarrassed at her talks with her friend and Rithesh might also have felt
disgraced for his sister has not maintained good relation with his friend.
I remembered the lines I read in a book “I
was born with relatives, but can at least chose my friends”.
Then I could think of the time when my
idealistic, logical and rational behavior created conflict with my ritualistic
relatives. Everyone will have such situations in their family and even with
friends. Former is chosen by nature and the latter we can choose. Finally
everybody is for us, we choose among them, we make friendship with whom we like
and be away from those we dislike. But still I would say everybody around us is
made for us.
It may not be possible to change everyone for you,
but you can choose to change anyone provided the change is positive always.
“To cover the whole muddy
earth with mat is inaccessible, rather what we can do is to make chappals for
our feet to avoid the dirt sticking on us and also try to stitch for those
whoever you can irrespective of anyone on this earth.”
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